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I’m going out with a really great guy at the moment and I really like him. We’ve been together a lot, almost constantly, since we actually got together mid-term and I really like that. I feel completely comfortable with him because I think we were both pretty open from the start and aren’t averse to talking about the idea of ‘us’. This excellent state of being means that I have a couple problems that I’ve not experienced thus far and as a result I’m slowly melting like the Wicked Witch of the West in her cauldron. I’ve never had to do this before and it’s eating me up; I’ve never had to buy Christmas presents for anyone who I’m really into and had to wonder, ‘what will this say’?
I’ve never been in a relationship over Christmas, odd in itself. And I’ve never had to worry so much about what the gifts say about me what they say about us and what they say for us.
Everything I consider in my mind as I go about the day, could be an option but it’s either too boring, too traditional, too insignificant, too impersonal, too expensive or too showy. I’m not being miserly when I say that it’d look bad to spend too much money, but at the same time it would be bad to not spend enough. I always think it’s bad if a gift could be purchased from any city, if it’s from a chain that’s as likely to be in his hometown as mine. If I give something, it doesn’t make sense for there to be a chance that he could have bought it and simply didn’t because it wasn’t good enough!

The days draw closer that I have to mail these things off and it’s not come together yet, it’s not gelled in my mind and so I’m left trying to desperately think of something that’s less than what I’ve got, but at the same time, more.